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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Puts Cousin in the “Frintschoft Zone”

January 11, 2023 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON It was sad news for Danny Dueck, 23, this week, after his second cousin, Maria Dueck, 24, informed him that he had now been relegated to the frintschoft zone. “I could tell he […]

The Daily Bonnet

Area Resident Becomes First Mennonite Man Ever to Tell His Wife He Loves Her

October 14, 2022 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON Area man Dick Froese made headlines throughout Leamington this week after he became the first Mennonite man ever to publicly express love for his own wife. “When we got married 40 years ago, […]

Unger Suspicion

The Top Ten Best Pandemic Pick-Up Lines

May 5, 2020 Andrew

The pandemic is certainly making things more difficult, romance-wise. I think we’re all grateful we won’t have to attend any weddings this summer, but it would be nice to at least know there are some […]

The Daily Bonnet

Clingy Mennonite Aunt Making Tally of All the Hugs You’ll Owe Her When This is Over

April 5, 2020 Andrew

YARROW, BC Ever since the pandemic broke out, Taunte Liza of Yarrow has been making a daily tally of all the hugs she’s missing out on and plans to cash in big time once this […]

The Daily Bonnet

Meddachschlop Over 60: Five Tips for Mennonite Seniors

February 3, 2020 Andrew

As we age, many things that we took for granted as young Mennonites start to become more difficult. Plowing is hard on the back. Hitting that high note during the Vespers service becomes a challenge. […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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