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gossip

The Daily Bonnet

Local Chiropractor Specializes in Treating Mennonite Rubbernecking Injuries

January 26, 2018 Andrew

CHORTITZ, MB A southern Manitoba chiropractor has decided to focus his talents on addressing neck injuries caused by prolonged gawking and staring, which, he says, is a common problem in Mennonite communities everywhere. “Prolonged periods […]

The Daily Bonnet

Dear Martha Reimer (Mennonite Advice Column)

January 16, 2018 Andrew

Dear Martha Reimer, A while ago I went to the doctor to have my bunions checked and when I took off my brown nylons and felt his warm rough manly hands on my bunions, I […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Parents Use Low German Code Language During Holiday Season

December 19, 2017 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Parents across southeast Manitoba have been speaking nonstop Plautdietsch this December in order to keep Bethany and Ethan from finding out what they’re getting for Christmas. “It’s great, we can jerad and mulwoakjs all […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Lady Uses Google Earth to Spy on Neighbours

August 31, 2017 Andrew

BLUMENGART, MB Mrs. Kleinsasser of the Blumengart area has discovered a fancy new tool to find out all the latest news about the neighbours: Google Earth. Ever since being shown the online tool by her […]

Unger Conviction

Gossip Masquerades as ‘Prayer Request’ Yet Again This Sunday

July 30, 2017 Andrew

HOCHBACH, MB Mr. Schultz stood up, once again, this Sunday to request prayer for his next door neighbours, Mr. and Mrs. William and Susanna Yoder, whom he overheard yelling and assumed there must be marital […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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