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beard

Unger the Influence

Pierre Poilievre Debuts New Mennonite Look

July 10, 2023 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Conservative leader Pierre Poilievre felt his current look was “just not conservative enough” and debuted a lovely new Mennonite beard this week. “Kind of a miracle really. Took me just three days to […]

The Daily Bonnet

Andrew Unger Slowly Becoming Rudy Wiebe

April 9, 2022 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Fledgling Mennonite writer Andrew Unger woke up this morning and realized that somehow, somewhere along the way, he began to look exactly like literary icon Rudy Wiebe. “I guess it was a subconscious […]

Unger & Thirst

Impossible to Tell if Bearded Friend is Mennonite or Just Really Into Craft Beer

October 18, 2020 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN When a bearded young man named David moved to Goshen from the country a few months ago, his physical appearance had friendly locals unsure whether to invite him to a Bible study or […]

The Daily Bonnet

Englisher So Hairy He’s Mistaken for a Mennonite

April 17, 2020 Andrew

HENDERSON, NE After not visiting a barber for more than two months, local graphic designer, Dylan Johnson, 23, of Henderson, Nebraska is being mistaken for a Mennonite everywhere he goes. “Oba yo, I’m glad to […]

Unger Suspicion

Trudeau Grows Authentic Menno Beard

January 18, 2020 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB At meetings in Winnipeg this week, Prime Minister Justin Trudeau revealed his amazing new Menno beard. “I can’t figure it out. When we last saw him, it was barely stubble, and now he’s […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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