Mennonites React With Disgust to ‘Showy’ Supermoon

WALDHEIM, SASK

The largest moon in almost 70 years has been strutting its stuff across the globe tonight, much to the chagrin of Mennonites who found the display to be “repulsive.”

“You don’t draw attention to yourself like that,” said Arnold B. Fast of the Waldheim area. “It’s just not done. What a peasche.”

The moon will not be this close to the Earth again until the year 2034.

“There it is up there all big and shiny and bright,” said Fast. “Totally unbecoming. No humility at all.”

Mennonite pastors have warned their congregations not to venture out to look at the moon this evening because that would “just be encouraging this unseemly behaviour.”

“Stay inside and sing some hymns,” said one local pastor. “Believe me, there’s absolutely nothing super about that so-called supermoon.”

(Photo credit: by blondinrikard/CC)

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