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modesty

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Church Shuns Snowman For Being ‘Immodestly Dressed’

March 27, 2026 Andrew

PASTWA, MB A local snowman was shunned this week for setting a bad example for the young people of the congregation by dressing immodestly. “There he is out in the yard without any clothes on yet,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Sydney Sweeney Spotted on Kansas Farm in Full Mennonite Attire

July 30, 2025 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Days after launching a controversial new ad campaign for American Eagle, actress Sydney Sweeney has decided to retire to a simpler life on the farm. “At least no one will accuse me of […]

The Daily Bonnet

Gen Z Adopts Mennonite Tradition of Covering their Ankles

June 2, 2024 Andrew

MARTENSVILLE, SK 23-year-old Gen Z influencer Evelen Sawatzky of Martensville has a message for Millenials out there – “cover your ankles!” “If you want to look old and out-of-fashion, then keep on wearing those ankle […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man’s Sexy Overalls Declared “Stumbling Block”

July 11, 2022 Andrew

TABER, AB Starting this week, Mennonite men throughout Alberta have been asked to refrain from sporting shit-covered overalls and rubber boots as they’re seen to be a “stumbling block” for single women in the area. […]

Unger Suspicion

Jordan Peterson Releases New ’12 Rules for Life: Swimsuit Edition’

May 19, 2022 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Tired of the “woke” swimsuit editions coming from the mainstream media, anti-PC crusader Jordan Peterson is set to release ’12 Rules for Life: Swimsuit Edition’ specifically for an audience that “appreciates good old-fashioned […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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