The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Neufeld Downs Entire Grey Cup Filled with Komst Borscht

December 13, 2021 Andrew

HAMILTON, ON All-star offensive lineman Patrick Neufeld of the Grey-Cup winning Winnipeg Blue Bombers became the first player in CFL history to fill the cup with oma’s delicious komscht borscht. “It was either that or […]

Unger & Thirst

Tim Hortons Collabs with Mr. Wiebe to Offer New Line of Mennonite Products

December 11, 2021 Andrew

OAKVILLE, ON Justin Wiebe, 23, of London, Ontario has just signed a lucrative $8,000,000 contract to design Mennonite-inspired Timbits and other products for Timmies locations across Canada. “They approached me in the MB lot after […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Family Gets Costco Membership Just for All the Free Samples

December 10, 2021 Andrew

CALGARY, AB The Wiebe family of Taber, Alberta love to drive into Calgary on Saturdays to do their weekly Costco sampling. “We don’t buy anything, but we’ve got to get our membership fee back somehow,” […]

Unger & Thirst

Supply Chain Crisis Now Threatening Papsi and Ravels

December 6, 2021 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB The supply chain crisis is now causing a considerable backlog in the Papsi and Ravel supply, such that residents of the small Mennonite town of Kleefeld have resorted to eating dilly bars with […]

Unger & Thirst

Why Canada is Unlocking Its Vault of Rogers Golden Syrup

December 2, 2021 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Ahh, Rogers Golden Syrup, aka liquid gold. In more ways than you imagined. It’s a little known fact that Canada keeps a reservoir of Rogers underneath the House of Commons. It’s Canada’s Fort […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 56 57 58 … 141 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Church Signs Pastor to Massive 30-Year $1.2 Million Contract
    January 18, 2017
  • Mennonite Sunday School Kids to Open for Barack Obama
    March 4, 2019
  • A List of Famous Dicks Who Are Not Mennonite
    February 17, 2018
  • Mennonite Woman Can Finally Start Her Christmas Shopping Now That It’s Snowed
    November 20, 2024
  • Schmaunt Fat Prices Soar to Record Highs
    June 20, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved