The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

New Steakhouse to Offer Extra Tough and Chewy Steak ‘Just the Way Mennonites Like It’

March 25, 2024 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB A brand new steakhouse in the small Mennonite town of Blumenort is offering patrons a delectable array of the toughest overcooked pieces of beef. “We specialize in old dairy cows,” said restaurant proprietor […]

Unger & Thirst

Authorities Seize Mennonite Woman’s Dangerous Looking Pickle Spears

March 24, 2024 Andrew

GRETNA, MB Avid canner Tina Kroeker was held for questioning at the border this week after the discovery of a large collection of dangerous looking pickle spears. “They asked if I had any weapons,” said […]

Unger & Thirst

Poutine Wins 5th Term with 88% of the Vote

March 22, 2024 Andrew

MONTREAL, QC A box of delicious greasy poutine has won a whopping 88% of the popular vote this week, although some have doubts about the validity of the results. “I didn’t vote for poutine. My […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Feeds Entire Family for a Week on One Little Caesars Pizza

March 11, 2024 Andrew

BLUMENORT, SK Area woman Tammy Dueck has perfected the art of making one Little Caesars pizza feed her growing family of 8 for an entire week. “I send one piece along with Dan for his […]

Unger & Thirst

McDonalds Takes McRib Off the Menu Just Long Enough for People to Forget How Terrible It Is

March 6, 2024 Andrew

AYLMER, ON Millions of Canadians have lined up outside of McDonalds restaurants this winter for the return of a sandwich they’ve been told is not nearly as bad as they remember. “Yikes, I lined up […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 18 19 20 … 137 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Saskatchewan Butcher Claims His Farmer Sausage is Just as Good as Anything they Make in Manitoba
    March 13, 2021
  • How to Totally Rock Your Mother’s Hand-Me-Down Bathing Suit This Summer!
    June 20, 2019
  • Thousands of Mennonite Grandmas Expected at Today’s Pride Parade
    July 15, 2017
  • Mennonite Man Can’t Stop Laughing at Corny Jokes
    August 12, 2019
  • Area Mall Fights Loitering by Blasting Mennonite Hymns
    April 17, 2025

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved