The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Jennifer Aniston Doused in Schmaunt Fat on Set of ‘The Morning Show’

August 8, 2024 Andrew

LOS ANGELES, CA According to sources, a group of angry Mennonites from Fresno tossed an ice cream pail full of white cream gravy known as “schmaunt fat” on TV star Jennifer Aniston. “It was totally […]

Unger & Thirst

Liquor Stores Flooded with Mennonites Pretending Not to Buy Beer for the Lake this Weekend

August 2, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB There were long lineups at liquor stores across the province this afternoon as Mennonites definitely did not stock up on their beer supply for the weekend. “Just here to pick up a bag […]

Unger & Thirst

‘Summer McIntosh Borscht’: Mennonites Rename Soup in Honour of Swimmer

August 1, 2024 Andrew

PARIS, FRANCE With two golds and a silver so far at the 2024 games, Summer McIntosh has captured the hearts of the nation, including the Canadian Mennonite population who have renamed a popular borscht after […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Takes Extra Shot of Ozempic Before Lunch at Oma’s

July 23, 2024 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Area man Cameron Hiebert has been trying to inject his way into good health for quite some time, but that hasn’t stopped him from devouring a nice plate of vereniki and formavorscht when […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Struggles with Soup at Local Vietnamese Restaurant

July 8, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local man, Peter Unger, 41, decided to check out this fabulous soup he’d heard so much about from his friends the Sawatzkys, who pride themselves in their miraculous ability to venture beyond traditional […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 17 18 19 … 140 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • The 12 Days of Mennonite Christmas
    December 25, 2021
  • Credit Union Accidentally Gives Loan to Englishers
    October 14, 2017
  • US Supreme Court to be Expanded from 9 Members to 535 and Renamed ‘Congress’
    May 8, 2022
  • A Glossary of Low German Words Used on the Daily Bonnet
    April 23, 2020
  • Ken Ham and Kent Hovind to Guest Star in Series Finale of ‘The Big Bang Theory’
    September 2, 2018

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved