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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Pastor Arrested for ‘Baptizing Under the Influence’

May 2, 2017 Andrew

STEINREICH, MB A local Mennonite pastor was arrested this past weekend for allegedly baptizing more than half a dozen people while in a state of mild intoxication. “Here in Manitoba we have a zero tolerance […]

Unger Conviction

Church Singles Group Disbanded After Three Decades Without Success

April 25, 2017 Andrew

DALMENY, SK When Linda, Dan, Albert, Annie, Susan, and Paul held the inaugural meeting of the West Dalmeny EMB Singles Group back in 1987, all of them had high hopes that their desire for a […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Shaves Beard into Goatee to Become Youth Pastor

April 24, 2017 Andrew

MORDEN, MB Local man Peter Berg of Morden has recently shaved his full manly beard into a goatee in preparation for his new job as youth pastor of the South Morden Brethren Church. “You can’t […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Woman Caught on Facebook During Church Service

April 23, 2017 Andrew

ROSENORT, MB Local woman, Mrs. Doris P. Sawatzky, 51, of the Rosenort area was caught posting pictures of cats on Facebook at 11:05 AM this past Sunday, which was right in the middle of Pastor […]

Unger Conviction

Anabaptist Seminary Graduates a Record Five Calvinists

April 22, 2017 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN The 2017 graduating class at South Goshen Mennonite Seminary has graduated a record number of Calvinists this year. “I must say, it’s been an upward trend toward Calvinism in the last few years,” […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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