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Articles by Andrew

Unger Suspicion

Southern Manitoba Transitions from Agricultural-Based Economy to Wedding Venue-Based Economy

October 4, 2019 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Agriculture has been the backbone of the economy in southern Manitoba for well over a century. Over the past couple years, however, it has been radically transformed to a wedding venue-based economy, as […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Forms Committee Responsible for Forming Other Committees

October 3, 2019 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON The South Waterloo Mennonite Church has just formed a radical new committee whose sole responsibility is forming other committees. The new Committee Committee is made up of a select group of committee members […]

The Daily Bonnet

Party Leaders Score Big Points During Plautdietsch Language Debate

October 2, 2019 Andrew

PLUM COULEE, MB With the notable exception of Bloc Quebecois leader Yves-Francois Blanchet, who said he really didn’t care to get the Mennonite vote, all major party leaders were present at the Plautdietsch language debate […]

The Daily Bonnet

Historians Baffled: “Were Mennonites Dancing in Danzig?”

October 1, 2019 Andrew

GDANSK, POLAND Between their origins in the Netherlands and their sojourn in Russia, a sizeable chunk of the Mennonite population spent two centuries in Prussia. And while Mennonite historians have written a lot on the […]

Unger Suspicion

Andrew Scheer Hoping to Become Canada’s First Schekjbenjel Prime Minister

September 30, 2019 Andrew

REGINA, SK The 2019 Canadian federal election is a profoundly historic one. Just this weekend, Conservative leader Andrew Scheer revealed that, if elected in October, he would become Canada’s very first schekjbenjel Prime Minister. “I […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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