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Articles by Andrew

Unger Conviction

Sunday School Kids Hold Freedom Convoy from Nursery All the Way to the Pastor’s Office

January 28, 2022 Andrew

AYLMER, ON After being totally fed up by being forced to eat plain Cheerios for snack each Sunday during Children’s Church, a group of Mennonite Sunday school kids stormed out of the nursery this past […]

Unger Suspicion

Mark Zuckerberg Breaks Down, Admits He Has No Real Friends

January 27, 2022 Andrew

PALO ALTO, CA Facebook founder and CEO Mark Zuckerberg has publicly acknowledged for the first time that he has not a single real friend. The news came as a shock to his millions of Facebook […]

Unger & Thirst

Area Man Mistakes Freedom Convoy for Timmies Line

January 27, 2022 Andrew

THUNDER BAY, ON Local man Dan Friesen, 51, was heading out for his daily double-double and chocolate cream glazed, when he entered what he thought was just the regular Timmies line. “I thought nothing of […]

Unger Suspicion

Joe Rogan Burns All His Neil Young Records

January 26, 2022 Andrew

NEWARK, NJ After legendary Canadian rock icon Neil Young threatened to pull his music from Spotify unless misinformationophile Joe Rogan left the platform, the UFC commentator/health expert has lashed out against Young by holding a […]

The Daily Bonnet

Convoy of Mennonite Truckers On Their Way To Ottawa

January 25, 2022 Andrew

ELMIRA, ON A convoy of Mennonite buggies are snaking their way through the country roads all the way from Elmira to Ottawa to demand their right to quilt whatever patterns they so choose. “Who’s Trudeau […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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