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Articles by Andrew

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Transit Purchases New Fleet of Honda Civics

October 18, 2022 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area seniors are really excited that the City of Steinbach has finally approved the long-awaited public transit system. “We’ve contracted 20-year-olds in Honda Civics to pick up any grandmas they see and drive […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Man to Corner You at the Water Cooler Tomorrow Morning and Tell You All About the Latest Joe Rogan Podcast

October 17, 2022 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Area man Jeremy Goertzen is really pumped about something he heard on Joe Rogan recently and is now planning to find you at the water cooler tomorrow morning and tell you all about […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Potluck Offers Incredible Array of Macaroni Salads

October 16, 2022 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN Attendees at the North Goshen Mennonite Church potluck this past Sunday were in left in absolute shock at the diverse array of macaroni salads on offer. “I’ve never seen anything like it. It […]

The Daily Bonnet

“He’s a 10 but….” (Mennonite Version)

October 15, 2022 Andrew

I’ve never been on TikTok. I barely know what it is. But, apparently, the entire purpose is to ask people how they’d rate other people on a scale of 1 to 10, yet. Like, my […]

The Daily Bonnet

Area Resident Becomes First Mennonite Man Ever to Tell His Wife He Loves Her

October 14, 2022 Andrew

LEAMINGTON, ON Area man Dick Froese made headlines throughout Leamington this week after he became the first Mennonite man ever to publicly express love for his own wife. “When we got married 40 years ago, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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