Two Groups That Absolutely Hate Each Other and Disagree on Nearly Everything Both Say They’re “Christians”


A number of supposedly Christian groups have gathered in Seminole this week to discuss what they have in common, which, as it turns out, is absolutely nothing.

“It’s almost as if we’re all just deciding for ourselves what to believe and what not to believe and then just keeping the label,” said conference attendee Mr. Klassen. “I mean, I can’t think of a single thing I have in common with those folks over there.”

From politics and theology to styles of worship and opinion on social issues, there wasn’t a single thing these Christians had in common.

“We started to discuss Jesus, but as soon as you started to break down and define what words means and what doctrines mean and … well, we couldn’t find agreement there either.”

Perhaps the only thing they had in common was agreeing that they were the true Christians and the others were totally false and on their way to Hell, although this started a huge debate about Hell and whether it literally really exists, or is just separation from God and …

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