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The Daily Bonnet

Winnipeg Hipsters Pay Big Bucks to Milk Cows

December 1, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Always seeking “authentic old school” experiences, the hipster population of Winnipeg is now venturing outside the Perimeter to milk cows in rural Manitoba. Mennonite farmers in the region have been eager to capitalize […]

The Daily Bonnet

Henderson Highway Permanently Closed to Motorized Vehicles

August 29, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Henderson Highway, in the heart of Winnipeg’s famed Anabaptist Quarter, is being permanently closed to motorized vehicular traffic this week after a request from concerned members of the Mennonite community. “We’re tired to having to […]

Unger Games

Canadian Football League to Add Third Team Named ‘Rough Riders’

June 21, 2017 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK In an effort to expand their appeal in central Saskatchewan, the Canadian Football League recently announced expansion to Saskatoon for the 2017 season. The new team is to be known as the ‘Roughriders.’ […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Accidentally Ventures Into Osborne Village

April 7, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Petey and Aganetha Hiebert of Altona, Manitoba found themselves in the “den of iniquity” after a GPS error led them to the Osborne Village neighbourhood of Winnipeg. “Oba, nay! Would you look at […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Pothole Swallows Entire Mennonite Family

April 7, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After more than a week of searching, a local Mennonite family has been declared ‘officially lost’ after their horse and buggy plummeted into a gigantic pothole on Henderson Highway at the end of […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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