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television

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Lifts Television Ban Just in Time For that New Menno Sitcom

January 3, 2024 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The MBEMMMCGC Church of Winkler has allowed a “temporary dispensation” to allow parishioners to buy a used TV from the thrift store, prop it up on a bale in the yard, and watch […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Love New Game Show ‘Frintschoft Feud’

November 19, 2023 Andrew

ABBOTSFORD, BC Ratings were through the roof this week after the Hieberts of Abbotsford appeared on the popular Family Feud game show. The appearance was so successful that the show’s producers have decided to create […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Couple Claim TV is Just for Watching Billy Graham Specials

April 4, 2023 Andrew

HENDERSON, NE Caught with a television set in their home this week by the church vice squad, the Friesens of Henderson, Nebraska claim they only really use the TV for the two allowable reasons – […]

The Daily Bonnet

“I don’t not love Winkler,” says Michael B. Jordan

March 4, 2023 Andrew

WINKLER, MB In a rarely-seen clip that was cut from the TV broadcast, Hollywood superstar Michael B. Jordan claimed he doesn’t “not love Winkler,” this according to Mr. Plett who’s been telling everyone about at […]

Unger Suspicion

‘Amazing Race Canada’ Contestants Super Excited to Fly Over Manitoba Yet Again

August 31, 2022 Andrew

TORONTO, ON After visiting every small town in the Canadian Rockies this season, Amazing Race Canada participants opened their envelopes to discover they’d be flying right over Manitoba this week. “Oooh, where are we going […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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