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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Grandma Eager to Start ‘Remote Learning’

March 20, 2021 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK When her local school announced they would be going to “remote learning” this semester, Mrs. Wiebe of Swift Current was eager to sign up for the course. “I’ve struggled with that remote […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Man Shocked to Discover that his “aM a zon ackount has bin sispendead”

November 22, 2020 Andrew

SHERWOOD PARK, AB Local man Ed Klassen, 69, of Sherwood Park, Alberta was absolutely flummoxed to discover that his “aM a zon” account had been disabled and desperately needed to be fixed “by logging in […]

The Daily Bonnet

Naive Manitoba Man Tries to Send a Text from Out by Sandilands Somewhere

September 6, 2020 Andrew

SANDILANDS, MB Local man Tim Giesbrecht, 41, was at the annual Giesbrecht wiener roast and horseshoes tournament at the ranger station in the Sandilands forest when he hauled out his phone between shots and attempted […]

Unger Conviction

Grandma Plett Discovers Bible iPhone App, Disrupts Service

August 26, 2020 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Grandma Plett, 81, of Linden Menno Manor, recently discovered a handy new Bible app on her iPhone. The app features large print and the ability to have Morgan Freeman read the Bible aloud […]

Unger Suspicion

World Breathes Collective Sigh of Relief as Zoom Goes Down

May 17, 2020 Andrew

AMSTERDAM, NETHERLANDS Billions of human beings around the globe received a temporary reprieve from incessant Zoom meetings this weekend after the app went out of commission. “Well, praise the Lord! This must have been divine […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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