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sports

Unger Games

Toronto Sees Massive Surge in Knackzoat Sales

October 21, 2025 Andrew

TORONTO, ON A trucker’s convoy-worth of sunflower seeds are on their way to Toronto this week to meet the demand of baseball fans in the GTA. “We’re basically just having them dump it in Sankofa […]

Unger Games

CFL Unveils New Logo

September 23, 2025 Andrew

TORONTO, ON After a series of highly popular rule changes this week, the Canadian Football League has unveiled a brand new logo modelled after Cracker Barrel. “We know how well that worked for them,” said […]

Unger Games

Stanley Cup Playoffs to be Extended Well into July Next Year

June 30, 2025 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY Hockey has long been designated a cold weather sport, but not so in the Bettman era, where desert cities are given franchises and the Stanley Cup final stretches well into spring. “Next […]

Unger Games

Jets Fan Relieved He Finally Has His Evenings Free to Get Some Yardwork Done

May 14, 2025 Andrew

RIVERTON, MB The Winnipeg Jets’ exciting, but brief, playoff run this year has been a huge setback for the Interlake’s biggest Jets fan Art Berg, 63, who’s been holed up inside every evening neglecting his […]

Unger Games

Baseball Commissioner Reinstates Shoeless Joe Just to Ruin ‘Field of Dreams’ for Everybody

May 13, 2025 Andrew

COOPERSTOWN, NY In a press conference held his afternoon in an Iowa cornfield, MLB commissioner Rob Manfred announced he had lifted the ban on several players including Shoeless Joe Jackson, all in a desperate attempt […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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