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Unger Games

Djokovic Retires from Tennis to Take on Trucking Job in Canada

January 23, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After dominating the sport of tennis for the past two decades, Novak Djokovic plans to use his immense talents to single-handedly solve the supply chain problem in Canada. “Got my Class 1 license […]

Unger Games

Djokovic Teams Up With Oma Krahn for Mixed Doubles Tournament

January 18, 2022 Andrew

MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA Just days after being booted out of Australia, deported tennis superstar Novak Djokovic has already selected a new partner for an upcoming mixed doubles tournament. “I met Oma Krahn in Hofnungschanzenhimmelsfeld, Manitoba while […]

Unger Games

Novak Djokovic Deported to Southern Manitoba

January 16, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Controversial tennis star Novak Djokovic was given a one-way ticket out of Australia this week and has selected a dairy farm south of Winkler as “the only place I really feel at home.” […]

Unger Games

Mrs. Friesen Signed On as New Bombers Kicker

October 11, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After cycling through a series of placekickers who couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn door, the Winnipeg Blue Bombers scoured the streets of North Kildonan in search of someone, anyone, who […]

The Daily Bonnet

New Fitness Program Encourages Mennonites to Literally LMAO

October 9, 2021 Andrew

PLUM COULEE, MB A new fitness centre in Plum Coulee is offering Mennonites in the surrounding area the opportunity to literally laugh their asses off. The new weight-loss program brings in old Mennonite men who […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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