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snow

Unger Suspicion

Single Snowflake Causes Vancouver Schools to Shut Down for ‘Snow Day’

March 5, 2018 Andrew

VANCOUVER, BC The discovery of a single solitary snowflake in the Vancouver suburb of Burnaby this Monday, forced schools across the region to shut down. The sighting was reported early Monday morning and immediately caused […]

The Daily Bonnet

Bump of Packed Down Snow at the End of Mr. Penner’s Driveway Declared Manitoba’s Highest Peak

February 7, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A one foot tall mound of packed down snow on Mr. Penner’s driveway has been officially declared the tallest mountain in Manitoba. “Move over Baldy Mountain, my driveway is king now!” said a […]

Unger Suspicion

Canadians Completely Shocked by the Existence of Winter

December 28, 2017 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Millions of Canadians from coast-to-coast were completely flummoxed this week as temperatures dropped to the same frigid Canadian winter temperatures as every other winter. Many took to social media to vent their disbelief. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites React With Disgust to ‘Showy’ Supermoon

November 14, 2016 Andrew

WALDHEIM, SASK The largest moon in almost 70 years has been strutting its stuff across the globe tonight, much to the chagrin of Mennonites who found the display to be “repulsive.” “You don’t draw attention […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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