CHILLIWACK, BC The South Chilliwack Gospel Mennonite Church has banned members from rolling up the rim at Tim Hortons, as it violates the church’s strict teaching against games of chance. The church took the action […]
Anonymous sources close to Santa Claus have revealed his list of very naughty Mennonites to the Daily Bonnet. The following Mennonites will NOT be receiving presents this year, because they’ve been very very bad! (The […]
WICHITA, KS The competition was fierce at the annual Mennonite Humility Awards this year, but, in the end, Mr. Samuel Janzen, 73, of Wichita was awarded the ‘Most Humble Person in Human History’ trophy. “Woohoo! […]
NORTH KILDONAN, MB Mrs. Mary Loewen of North Kildonan was just going about her daily chores when she discovered a half dozen copies of the ‘Preservings’ journal underneath her son Adam’s mattress. “Oba! Looks like […]
STRASBURG, PA The leadership at South Strasburg EMB passed a resolution this week banning the use of the Google Chrome web browser. Church members caught using Google Chrome will be forced to paint their computer […]
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