The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

schmaunt fat

Quizzes

What is your favourite Russian Mennonite food?

February 25, 2018 Andrew

Yesterday, we asked which Russian Mennonite foods you had tried. The top ten most common were: 1) Vereniki 2) Dill Pickles 3) Formavorscht 4) Cabbage Borscht 5) Roll Kuchen 6) Cold Cuts 7) Whipped Cream/Jell-O […]

Unger & Thirst

How Many of These Common Mennonite Foods Have You Tried?

February 24, 2018 Andrew

How many of these Russian Mennonite treats, many of which we stole from the Ukrainians and Poles, have you consumed? (I’m not knowledgable enough about Swiss Mennonite food to make a list of 50. If […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite CPAP Machine Provides Continuous Flow of Schmaunt Fat

January 10, 2018 Andrew

HERBERT, SK Cardiologists in the small town of Herbert, Saskatchewan are testing out a new CPAP machine that would provide Mennonites with a continuous flow of schmaunt fat while they sleep. Local man Dale Broesky […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Scores Big on ‘Wheel of Fortune’

October 21, 2017 Andrew

CULVER CITY, CA Mrs. Carolyn Berg, 63, from Blumenort, Manitoba scored big on ‘Wheel of Fortune’ this past week after all the puzzles had something to do with Mennonites. She took home more than $120,000, […]

Unger & Thirst

A Calorie Guide to Mennonite Cooking

September 16, 2017 Andrew

In the days before we became lazy and assimilated, Mennonites wouldn’t concern themselves with such things. We worked hard all day on the farm, where we could easily sweat out even the very fattiest of […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 5 6 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Man Becomes ‘Completely Hooked’ on the Pink Stuff
    August 12, 2019
  • Alberta Premier Calls Shirtless Dude at 7-11 “Most Persecuted Man in All of Human History”
    October 13, 2022
  • Mennonite Sect Heads to Toronto to Await the Rapture
    February 25, 2019
  • “How do they get the cottage cheese in the vereniki?”: Mennonite Man Unlocks the Vereniki Secret
    October 26, 2021
  • Local Man Shocked to Discover that his “aM a zon ackount has bin sispendead”
    November 22, 2020

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved