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ravel

Unger & Thirst

Paper Straw Totally Disintegrates Before Mennonite Man Gets to the Bottom of His Papsi

August 24, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area man Art Brandt, 58, was enjoying a Papsi and Ravel at his favourite local burger joint this past week, when he discovered they were now offering paper straws instead of the ones […]

Unger & Thirst

Supply Chain Crisis Now Threatening Papsi and Ravels

December 6, 2021 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB The supply chain crisis is now causing a considerable backlog in the Papsi and Ravel supply, such that residents of the small Mennonite town of Kleefeld have resorted to eating dilly bars with […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Farmers Excited for Bountiful Papsi and Ravel Crop this Year

June 28, 2020 Andrew

FRIEDENSRUH, MB After a good start to the growing season, farmers across the Pembina Valley are enthusiastic about this year’s Papsi and Ravel crop. “We’ve had a good rain in June and then a nice […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Football Player Suspended Two Games after Testing Positive for Papsi and Ravel

August 26, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After a wee bit too much Papsi and Ravel was found in his system, Andreas Heinrichs has been suspended from playing the next two games of the EMBC church touch football league. “Oba, […]

Unger & Thirst

Pepsi-Cola to Rebrand in Mennonite Country

August 1, 2017 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Due to slumping sales, Pepsi-Cola is undergoing a name and logo change in certain markets such as the Pembina Valley, Fraser Valley, Chihuahua and the Paraguayan Chaco. The cola will now officially be known […]

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  • Mennonite Preacher Encourages Young People to ‘Hover Hand’
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  • Mysterious Metal Monolith Appears in Front of Winkler Co-op
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  • McCartney Cancels Show in Mennonite Town Over Lack of Vegetarian Options
    July 21, 2017
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    August 25, 2020
  • Retired ‘Main Street Cruiser’ to Become ‘Sunday Driver’
    October 23, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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