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morden

Unger & Thirst

Experts Now Say Schmaunt Fat Leaked from Lab in Winkler

March 6, 2023 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Experts are now saying the explosion of delicious schmaunt fat over the last few years did not arrive naturally but likely originated from a top secret laboratory in Mrs. Froese’s summer kitchen. “Oba, […]

Unger Suspicion

Winkler Spy Balloon Shot Down Above Morden

February 4, 2023 Andrew

MORDEN, MB A couple of slingshots and some good aim were all it took to down a massive spy balloon from Winkler that was hovering in the skies of neighbouring Morden for the past few […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Notices “Chastity” Sign Just 20 Minutes Too Late

May 13, 2022 Andrew

MORDEN, MB Morden’s famous “Chastity” sign was a little too far down the road for local dating couple Jeremy Goertzen and Amy Fehr, who had just spent considerable time in the back seat of Jeremy’s […]

The Daily Bonnet

Jant Sied Story Takes Home Top Prize at Mennonite Oscars

April 8, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The annual Mennonite Oscars and Faspa were held in the MB church basement in Winkler this afternoon, with the top prize going to the epic Anabaptist musical Jant Sied Story. “It’s a tale […]

Unger & Thirst

Massive Shared Chicken Chef to Open Between Morden and Winkler

March 6, 2022 Andrew

MORDEN-WINKLER, MB After the unparalleled success of a shared hospital, the rival southern Manitoba cities of Morden and Winkler have agreed to build a massive Chicken Chef equidistant between the two communities. “The time for […]

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