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meat

Unger & Thirst

Adventurous Mennonite Man Opts for Schintjefleesch Over Foarmaworsht

December 30, 2021 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Mr. Colin Berg is being hailed as “Steinbach’s most adventurous eater” this week after he went out on a limb and ordered the ham rather than the farmer sausage to accompany his vereniki. […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Reminds Husband, “Gravy is not a beverage.”

September 26, 2021 Andrew

ST. CATHARINES, ON Earl Driedger, 61, of St. Catharines has been downing cups of beef gravy for years, much to the chagrin of his wife Brenda. “Just because you can drink it, doesn’t mean you […]

Unger & Thirst

New Study: Farmer Sausage Contains Only “Trace Amounts” of Actual Farmers

March 10, 2021 Andrew

FURTWANGLER, MB A new farmer sausage study from the University of Tubular Meat in Plum Coulee, Manitoba suggests that the vast majority of farmer sausage is actually completely farmerless. “I’m not sure what they’re putting […]

Unger & Thirst

Mexican Mennonite Woman Invites Friends Over for the Wrong Kind of Disco

March 6, 2021 Andrew

MANITOBA COLONY, MEXICO Mrs. Epp invited her friends over after church this week for what she thought would be a socially-distanced grilling of meat on a giant wok made from an old plow disc, but […]

Unger & Thirst

Little Abe Confuses Smoke Shack for Outhouse

September 28, 2020 Andrew

WARMAN, SK Little Abe Wiebe, 7, of Warman really had to go after a vigorous game of horseshoes with the cousin on Saturday and, so, ran for the nearest outhouse he could find. “No, Abie, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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