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Unger & Thirst

Frustrated Mennonite Man Still Waiting for His Cookies

April 28, 2021 Andrew

TOFIELD, AB Nearly two weeks after he selected “accept all cookies” on one of his favourite websites, Darryl Krahn of Tofield is still waiting for the baked goods to arrive. “My Helen just tells me, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Taunte Lina Becomes Instagram Influencer

February 16, 2021 Andrew

REINLAND, MB Unbeknownst to her grandchildren, over the past few months Taunte Lina has amassed a massive following and become one of Instagram’s top influencers. “I can yikyak and tiktok with the best of them,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

7 Naughty Mennonite Emojis (and What They Really Mean)

February 6, 2021 Andrew

These days you have to be careful when you’re using emojis. You don’t want to unintentionally seduce the pastor’s son. In order to aid clear and concise communication, the Daily Bonnet has created this handy […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Spends All Day Tracking Her Amazon Package

December 21, 2020 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Mrs. Loewen of Saskatoon has been eagerly anticipating her package from Amazon this Christmas and has been spending every waking moment checking for shipping updates. “Dietschlaund! It’s still in Flin Flon, Manitoba for […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Man’s Biggest Fear is Showing His Fear

November 6, 2020 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Fear of being perceived as being fearful is an at all time high these days, with thousands of insecure men who fear being seen as fearful posting stuff like “stop living in fear” […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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