WINKLER, MB Not wanting to participate in anything resembling a “lottery”, Mennonites of the Winker area have agreed to get the vaccine so long as their names are thrown into the hat for the quilt […]
WINKLER, MB Pastor Dave has finally given the green light for Winklerites to “go have shots in Morden”. First in line was Susan Froese, 35, who had been waiting for this announcement for quite some […]
THUNDER BAY, ON After nationwide protests saw a “disturbing” presence of neck tattoos, bleach-blonde hair, and mirrored sunglasses, the Government of Canada issued a new health advisory requiring “all douchey neck tattoos” to be fully […]
WINNIPEG, MB Thousands of pro-plague protestors gathered at The Forks in Winnipeg this afternoon under the mistaken impression they were actually in Steinbach. “Ahh, it’s great to be here in Steinbach again,” said pro-plague leader […]
EDMONTON, AB Alberta’s most popular and respected minister of religion has been given a new title: Minister of Health. “It was only natural that we appoint this recently jailed man as Minister of Health,” said […]
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