The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

family gathering

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Practices Walking on Eggshells for Upcoming Family Gatherings

December 1, 2021 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Lois Redekop, 51, has been spending a couple hours each day in recent weeks walking on eggshells in anticipation of a whole bunch of really awkward family gatherings coming up later this month. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Uncle Barred from Thanksgiving Gathering after Forgetting His ID and Vax Card

October 10, 2021 Andrew

ROSENHIMMEL, SK Oncle Thomas was turned away at the biannual Peters Thanksgiving gathering in Rosenhimmel this week after he conveniently “forgot” his proof of vaccination. “Oba, I think I left it at home somewhere,” said […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Grandma Can Finally Sleep Tonight Because She Didn’t Run Out of Food at the Gathering

August 19, 2021 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Mrs. Pankratz can count on a good solid six hours of sleep tonight after the family gathering that she’d been worrying about for months came and went without a single person starving to […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Family Looking Forward to Delightful Illegal Gathering this Easter

April 1, 2021 Andrew

SCHRATJLIJCH, MB Plans are already in the works for a delightfully illegal Easter this year. The Hiebert family of Schratjlijch, Manitoba, for example, have been dutifully shopping, cooking, and otherwise preparing for their first illegal […]

The Daily Bonnet

Friesens Report the Reimers for Having an Illegal Gathering

March 26, 2021 Andrew

SCHNERVFELD, MB The police were present at the Reimer house to hand out dozens of fines after the Friesens ratted out the Reimers for eating paska without masks and being within six feet of an […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 … 5 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Manitoba Hires Mennonite Quilting Ladies to Patch Provincial Highways
    May 14, 2022
  • Local Pastor Reassures Paranoid Congregation: “Don’t Worry, Chem Trails are Just Schmaunt Fat”
    January 19, 2021
  • Ovechkin on Pace to Smash Gretzky’s All-Time Points Record by the Year 2055
    April 6, 2025
  • Mennonite Woman Consumes 4L of Ice Cream Just for the Pail
    July 3, 2020
  • Young Entrepreneur Sells ‘Star Maps’ to Steinbach Homes
    September 11, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved