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Unger Conviction

Special Number is Not All That Special

February 8, 2017 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Every time the Friesen sisters come up to the front to do their zany rendition of ‘Power in the Blood’ congregants of East Altona Brethren Church are left questioning what exactly was so […]

Quizzes

How ‘Conservative’ Are You: A Guide for Mennonites

January 21, 2017 Andrew

According to recent media portrayal, Mennonites are a simple people who live in community, wear funny clothes, and smuggle drugs from Mexico. However, this characterization is a little misleading as there is wide diversity in […]

Unger Conviction

Mannequin Challenge or…Mennonite Worship Service?

November 20, 2016 Andrew

SHICKLEY, NE Omaha resident Hank Newman took a drive out to Nebraska Mennonite country and was shocked to discover that the recent viral ‘mannequin challenge’ had already reached the area. “I attended a Mennonite worship service […]

Unger & Thirst

Congregation Votes to Continue Serving Raisin Buns at Funerals

October 22, 2016 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB Tempers flared at the Mennonite church last night, after rogue elder Gunther W. Thiessen put forward a motion to replace the traditional funeral raisin buns with store-bought dinner rolls. “Some of us don’t like […]

Unger & Thirst

Steinbach Man Gets Totally Hammered on Welch’s Grape Juice

July 8, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB In an effort to discourage drunkenness, many Mennonite churches in the Hanover area have replaced wine with non-alcoholic grape juice during monthly communion services. Yet, somehow, every communion Sunday, local dentist, Elbert W. Berg, 41, is […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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