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Unger Conviction

Local Free Church to Charge Admission

April 3, 2018 Andrew

BEZKOSHTOVNO, KS After declining tithing in recent years a Free Church in the small Kansas town of Bezkoshtovno has decided they have no choice but to charge a nominal admission charge of $7.99 per person. […]

Unger & Thirst

Adorable Mennonite Child Becomes Millionaire Selling Chocolates to Old People

March 25, 2018 Andrew

SOUTH BLUMENORT, MB 6-year-old Anna Berg of South Blumenort has become the region’s latest millionaire after selling a record number of chocolate-covered almonds to area seniors. While Mennonites have the reputation for being rather frugal, […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonites Buy Naming Rights to New Edmonton Arena

March 14, 2018 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB A group of wealthy Mennonites have honoured their favourite summer treat by purchasing the naming rights to the downtown Edmonton arena. Beginning today, the Oilers’ arena will officially be known as Rogers Golden […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Lady Calls Into ‘Trading Post’ Every Day for Thirty Years

February 28, 2018 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Area woman Mrs. L. Brandt has been trying to get rid of her old ironing board on the radio Trading Post for the past three decades. “I haven’t missed a Trading Post since the […]

Unger Conviction

8% Tithe Now Acceptable Due to Economic Downturn

February 6, 2018 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN After a slumping economy and soaring unemployment rate, the Society for the Proliferation of Mennonite Churches has determined that “an 8% tithe will be acceptable for the foreseeable future.” The change was […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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