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Unger Conviction

Pastor’s Son to Take Over the Family Business

September 27, 2018 Andrew

HOUSTON, TX After announcing senior pastor Jim’s retirement from full-time ministry this past week, the Big Tex Gospel Church and Smokehouse in Houston has already chosen a successor to lead the church into the future. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Winkler Realtor Invites Nosy Mennonites to Wander Around the Friesen’s House

July 11, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Dozens of Mennonite couples showed up at the Friesen home this past Sunday between 2:00 and 4:00 pm even though they had absolutely no intention of buying the place. “We were just there […]

Unger Suspicion

School’s Out! Back-to-School Shopping Begins!

June 30, 2018 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Just seconds after Calgary students were released for summer vacation, advertisers began pestering their parents to begin their back-to-school shopping. “Pencils, binders, backpacks, and all the latest fashions. We’ve got it all,” said […]

The Daily Bonnet

New Horse-and-Buggy Dealership Opens in ‘Automobile City’

June 10, 2018 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB There was a time when Steinbach was so conservative that springs in the carriage seat were considered worldly and the railway was moved 8 miles out of town so the sinners couldn’t get […]

Unger Suspicion

Canadian Government Spends $4.5 Billion on Old Useless Crap From Mrs. Penner’s Garage Sale

June 1, 2018 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON The Canadian government announced Tuesday that it would be spending more than four billion dollars of taxpayer money on purchasing “whatever useless crap those Mennonites have for sale at their garage sales this […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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