The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

bathroom

Unger & Thirst

Local KFC Sees 50% Reduction in Diarrhea After Getting Rid of Taco Bell

July 13, 2023 Andrew

ELKHART, IN Students at Anabaptist Mennonite Theological Seminary in Elkhart have reported a significant reduction in diarrhea cases this semester after the local KFC kicked out the adjoining Taco Bell. “Quite frankly, it’s a relief,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Spends All Day Fighting with Automatic Paper Towel Dispenser

July 14, 2022 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON Mr. Eby of Waterloo spent more than 6 hours at his local Walmart this afternoon trying to get the automatic paper towel dispenser to recognize him. “It’s worse than milking a cow,” said […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Spends Two Hours Selecting Least Awkward Urinal

July 6, 2022 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Altona man Pat Rempel, 47, spent more than two hours selecting the proper urinal position during a trip to a Winnipeg shopping mall this week. “Okay, okay, Pat, you can do this,” he […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Invokes Emergencies Act to Remove Husband from Bathroom

February 24, 2022 Andrew

BLACK CREEK, BC After her husband Dan had “been on the can for more than an hour,” Mrs. Susan Kliewer of Black Creek declared the Emergencies Act. “My gosh, I bet he’s reading back issues […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Completes Bathroom Renovation in Mere Decades

January 9, 2022 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON When the Baumans purchased a lovely bungalow in Kitchener in 1973, Ernie promised Lois that he’d have the bathroom renovated by their 50th wedding anniversary. Well, it seems Mr. Bauman is a full […]

Posts pagination

1 2 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Man Disproves Evolution by Carbon Dating “Welcome to Morden Sign”
    August 7, 2023
  • “What is this – Calgary?” Winnipeg Man Can’t Figure Out Warm Holiday Temperatures
    December 28, 2019
  • American Hockey Expert Makes His Picks for NHL Playoffs
    April 25, 2018
  • Even Borscht is No Longer ‘Cheap as Borscht’ After Surge in Cabbage Prices
    February 19, 2020
  • Steinbach Man Opens ‘Noah’s Ark Encounter’ in His Basement
    September 17, 2024

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved