Stanley Cup to be Filled with Rogers Golden Syrup this Year


Even though they’re down 2 games to none, the Edmonton Oilers are confident they can be the ones to drink golden syrup from the Cup this year.

“We’ve got all of La Crete, Alberta praying for us,” said Connor McDavid. “And I’m sure all those La Creters will out-pray the Flames fans down in Linden who are praying against us.”

Drinking Rogers Golden Syrup from the Stanley Cup has a long tradition, dating back to the first time Jonathan Toews hoisted the trophy all those years ago.

“I’ve heard it’s a bit of a sticky mess,” said McDavid, “but at least they provide us with some roll kuchen to sop it all up.”

However, the Florida Panthers say they won’t be partaking in the golden syrup if they win the Cup.

“We’re based in Florida,” said Panthers’ captain Aleksander Barkov, “so the only thing we drink is really sketchy moonshine, anyway.”

NHL commissioner Gary Bettman plans to keep the Cup free of golden syrup as long as he’s in charge, saying he’ll do everything in his power to make sure no Canadian team wins the Cup. After all, having one in the finals is plenty bad enough, he says.

(photo credit: Larry Thiessen. Thanks, Larry!)

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