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Search Results for crokinole

The Daily Bonnet

Top 10 Stocking Stuffer Ideas for Mennonites

December 16, 2022 Andrew

Let’s face it. Gone are the days when a paper bag filled with peanuts is sufficient to satisfy the demands of a Mennonite child. These days all the city Mennos prefer socks filled with various […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Desperate to Find Some Relation to Davy Klaassen

November 23, 2022 Andrew

LOMA PLATA, PARAGUAY Moments after Dutch midfielder Davy Klaasen scored his first World Cup goal, millions of Mennonites scoured their family history books to see if maybe, just maybe, they were somehow related. “Oba, well, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Now in Charge of British Columbia

November 18, 2022 Andrew

VICTORIA, BC After having his name selected in the traditional Mennonite manner – by drawing lots – a man from Kitchener, Ontario by the name of David Eby is now Premier of British Columbia. “Well, […]

Unger Games

Canadian Supreme Court Rules ‘Curling is a Real Sport’

October 4, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON In a 6-3 decision, the Supreme Court of Canada ruled today that “curling is actually a real sport, eh.” “Weighing all the evidence, it’s quite clear that curling is a sport,” said Judge […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbacher Surpasses 10,000 Career Kjnipsing Yards

July 26, 2022 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON Argos running back Andrew Harris was not the only Steinbacher to set a record this week. 92-year-old Herman W. Klippenstein became the first kjnipser to kjnips more than 10,000 career yards after defeating Robert […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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