Mennonite Woman Jumps Out of Giant Shoofly Pie at Church Picnic

LANCASTER, PA

Harkening back to raunchy bachelor parties of the 1950s, the Southeast Lancaster MMCC church decided to surprise guests at their annual spring picnic by having Mrs. Agnes Bender, 83, pop out of a giant shoofly pie just as soon as the crowd got to the end of Hymn 606.

“Wow! Well, I was wondering what was up with that giant pie,” said Mr. Geiser. “Mrs. Bender sure shocked us with that one.”

Mrs. Bender, who was wearing nothing but a slip, was soaked to the bone in gooey molasses as she leaped out of the pie with her arms in the air. She then proudly invited guests to dig in and enjoy the tasty treat.

“We can’t let a good shoofly pie like this go to waste,” said Mrs. Bender. “It’s my own wet-bottom recipe and it’s fantastic as you’ll see. Here take a piece. Try it.”

The crowd was initially reluctant to eat a pie that a sweaty old woman had been stewing in for a few hours, but after a while decided it was just too good an opportunity to pass up.

“No Mennonite can resist a shoofly pie,” said Mr. Geiser, “unless you’re maybe one of those Russian Mennonites who haven’t even heard of it. Oh, well, it’s their loss.”

The entire 2 ton pie was consumed by the MMCC church within forty-five minutes.

(photo credit: by cristinabe )

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