Mennonite Man Super Disappointed He Can’t Use His Fake Vaccine Passport Anymore


Local man Mr. Thiessen is super upset at the Manitoba government for removing his ability to use his fake vaccine passport.

“After all this money I invested in getting this fake thing made, they had to go and get rid of the passports altogether!” yelled Thiessen. “How am I going to stick it to the man if they’re not even requiring me to show the thing anymore!”

Thiessen says he spent 40 dollars on printer ink and an entire weekend trying to get his fake vaccine passport to look just right.

“And it’s all for nuscht!” said Thiessen, who is currently protesting to bring back the vaccine mandate. “I’ve got nothing to live for if I’m not pulling something over on the government.”

Friends of Thiessen are wondering what the heck he’s blathering about since no one in Winkler was ever asking for those things anyway.

(photo credit: Drew Stephens/CC)

Elon Musk Tops Forbes List of "America's Favourite Oligarchs"
Mennonites Baptized in Low German Forced to Do it Over Again in High German