Mennonite Man Discovers Suspenders Are No Good for Bungee Jumping

WICHITA, KS

Local man Darrel P. Friesen, 41, discovered the hard way that your typical Mennonite suspenders from Wal-Mart are completely insufficient to use for bungee jumping. Mr. Friesen somehow managed to survive the fall, but is now on life support at a local hospital.

“We were out at the bridge and this Mennonite man just came up to us and said he wanted to bungee jump,” said a local extreme sports enthusiast. “I offered to strap him in with our equipment, but he just tugged at his suspenders and said, ‘Oba, no, I’ve got it covered.'”

Friesen then clipped his suspenders to the bridge and jumped off. Witnesses say he dangled off the edge of the bridge for just a moment before plummeting to the river below.

“I’ve gotta say. It wasn’t very safe, but he’s the most daring bungee jumper I’ve ever seen,” said one witness. “I’m glad he survived.”

Authorities are warning Mennonites everywhere that suspenders are not suitable bungee jumping equipment and that any bungee jumpers should seek advice and equipment from a licensed expert, preferably not just a Mennonite who claims to be an expert.

(photo credit: by Julie Facine/CC)

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