BLUMENORT, MB
Disgruntled Winnipeg Jets goalie Connor Hellebuyck is demanding a trade to the only team he’s willing to play for – the Blumenort Menno Knights.
“We’re working on a deal that will send Hellebuyck to Blumenort in exchange for little Timmy Hiebert and up and comer Bradley Wiens,” said Jets GM Kevin Cheveldayoff. “It’s as good as deal as we could muster.”
The ladies at the Blumenrot church were busy selling schentje and jam to help pay for the new goalie’s $12 million a year contract.
“We might have to do a couple soup and pie fundraisers, too,” said Mrs. Penner. “Maybe even a quilt auction.”
Hellebuyck promises to be absolutely lights out for the Menno Knights in the regular season, but plans to suck like usual in the playoffs.
