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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Woman’s Ice Cream Pails Full of Cash Completely Unaffected By Banking Crisis

March 21, 2023 Andrew

LINDEN, AB Unlike a significant number of her contemporaries, Mrs. Broesky of Linden, Alberta was completely unconcerned this week about the banking crisis south of the border. “Oba, I was getting messages on the WhatsApp […]

Unger Suspicion

James Reimer Declines to Wear ‘Violent’ San Jose Sharks Jersey

March 19, 2023 Andrew

SAN JOSE, CA Saying that the violent imagery goes against his religion, San Jose Sharks goalie James Reimer has declined to wear the team’s jersey. “It’s something that has weighed heavily on my conscience ever […]

Unger Suspicion

“Road Conditions” Keep Winnipeggers from Leaving the City to Visit the Relatives

March 17, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Icy roads were just the latest in a long series of reasons why the Pletts of North Kildonan will not be visiting their frintschoft in Altona this weekend. “Here we are trying to […]

Unger Suspicion

Oscar Red Carpet Replaced with Mennonite Quilt

March 16, 2023 Andrew

HOLLYWOOD, CA Things were a little different at the 95th annual Academy Awards this year, as the signature red carpet was replaced with a massive Mennonite quilt made by the quilting bee ladies at the […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Man Deteles 6-Motnh Old Tweet After Discovreing Typo

February 27, 2023 Andrew

STIENBACH, MB Area man Pete Sawatkzy was shockead and dismayed to find a tpyo in a Tweet he psosted more than 6 months ago. “Oba, nay! This error-laden tWeet has been sitting for the months […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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