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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Seniors Confuse Lobby Cam for OnlyFans

December 13, 2023 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK It seems that Smiling Menno Manor in Saskatoon just got their very own OnlyFans channel. Contractors just installed a camera in the lobby, which really had residents excited about the possibilities. “Just this […]

Unger Suspicion

Steinbach Man Crashes into Giant Tiger

December 7, 2023 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Wildlife specialists were called to downtown Steinbach this week after area man Michael Teichrob, 21, crashed right into a giant tiger on Main Street. “Gosh, I’ve heard of accidents with moose and elk, […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Man Eager to Mow the Lawn this December

December 6, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB With temperatures soaring to Abbotsford levels this winter, Winnipeg man Spencer Wiens has decided it’s time to dust off the old lawnmower and take it for a spin. “I sold my snowblower,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Smoke Detector Battery Conveniently Programmed to Expire and Chirp Loudly at 2 in the Morning

December 5, 2023 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB After five years of hard work keeping the family safe, a 9V battery in the Loewen home over in Mitchell is set to conveniently expire and chirp incessantly starting at about 2 this […]

Unger Suspicion

Royal Canadian Mint Brings Back the Penny Just to Have Some Place to Put King Charles

November 14, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB It seems the long-forgotten penny is of some use after all. This afternoon, the Royal Canadian Mint announced they’d be bringing back the one-cent coin just so they’d have some place to put […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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