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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Balenciaga Releases New $2000 Shit-Covered Mennonite Rubber Boots

May 20, 2024 Andrew

SAN SEBASTIÁN, SPAIN Luxury Spanish fashion brand Balenciaga has just announced the release of what they call the “Menno Boot”, a farm-used rubber boot caked in cow shit. “And best of all, it’s only $2000,” […]

Unger Suspicion

King Charles Unveils Stunning New Portrait

May 15, 2024 Andrew

LONDON, UK In a ceremony earlier this morning, His Majesty King Charles III pulled back the curtain on his very first portrait since ascending to the throne. The image portrays the monarch in vivid detail. […]

Unger Suspicion

Beta Male Finally Switches to VHS

May 8, 2024 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN Dave Miller, 31, of Goshen has been a devout Beta male ever since he inherited his grandfather’s VCR and collection of Smokey and the Bandit movies from the 80s. “And people say being […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Man Stuck 15 Years At Train Crossing

May 7, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area man Greg Neufeld, 41, stopped for a train in Winnipeg back in 2009 and, according to this wife Diane, is still there some 15 years later. “I texted him to see where […]

Unger Suspicion

‘May the 3rd Be With You’: Confused Mennonite Man Sends Premature Greeting

May 4, 2024 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Area man Larry Hiebert, 51, turned more than a few heads this Friday, after he spent the whole day greeting folks with a hearty “May the 3rd be with you.” “He started on […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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