Quizzes
Quiz: What Do You Know About Quakers?
Normally, we focus on Mennonites around these parts, but Quakers are close enough…or are they? We’ll find out. What we do know is that they’re so much more than just oats and oil. If you’re […]
Unger Suspicion
Unger & Thirst
Tim Hortons Raises Starting Wage to 15 Timbits an Hour
OAKVILLE, ON In response to widespread criticism of recent cuts to employee benefits in some of its stores, iconic Canadian donut chain Tim Hortons has graciously decided to raise its starting wage from 12 Timbits […]
Unger Games
Canadian Men’s Hockey Team is Mostly Just Random Dudes from Your Church Floor Hockey League
BRANDON, MB The Canadian Olympic Men’s hockey team was announced Thursday and it turns out most of the guys are just random dudes from your church floor hockey league. “With the NHL boycotting the Olympics […]
Unger Suspicion
British Columbian Freezes to Death Within Minutes of Arriving in Winnipeg
WINNIPEG, MB Mr. Mark Thiessen of Chilliwack froze to death after walking a hundred metres from the airport terminal to his rental car this weekend. Police found his frozen corpse, with his debit card in […]
Unger Suspicion
Volkswagen Offers Customers Financial Compensation for the Embarrassment of Driving a Volkswagen
WOLFSBURG, GERMANY After executive Oliver Schmidt was sentenced to seven years in prison for the Volkswagen emissions scandal, the German automaker is now offering embarrassed customers financial compensation for the “utter humiliation of having to […]