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Unger Suspicion

Unger Games

American Man Claims to be Huge ‘Hackey’ Fan

December 6, 2019 Andrew

BOSTON, MA Local man Darren Smith, 45, is starting to really annoy his friends by talking about the Canadian sport of “ice hackey” all the time. “I’ve really gotten into hackey lately,” said Smith. “Man, […]

Unger Suspicion

Kitchener, Ontario to be Renamed Berlin

December 4, 2019 Andrew

BERLIN, ON Eager to reclaim its past glory, the city of Kitchener, Ontario has decided to go back to calling itself Berlin. “The only reason we changed that name in the first place was to […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Mall Offering Free Stretcher Service for Shoppers During Holiday Season

December 1, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Beginning with Black Friday and ending on Christmas Eve, the Frosty Shores Mall in Winnipeg will be offering customers free gift wrapping, parking validation, and an escort out of the building on a […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonites Inspire Tesla to Release ‘New Improved’ Cybertruck

November 28, 2019 Andrew

PALO ALTO, CA After a disastrous launch that saw two windows shattered and a design that was universally mocked as looking like a cast-off from the 1980s, Telsa owner Elon Musk consulted with a Mr. […]

Unger Suspicion

Cheech & Chong Heading Straight for Niverville

November 27, 2019 Andrew

NIVERVILLE, MB After hearing the results of the recent cannabis plebiscite in the Mennonite town of Niverville, Cheech & Chong loaded up their VW van and hope to be in town by this weekend. “We’ll […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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