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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Grandpa Now Charging $8 for Five Minute Piggyback Ride

February 9, 2020 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The entrepreneurial spirit of Mennonites will never die it seems, as Mr. Sawatzky of Winkler is now charging eight bucks a ride for a trip around the church lobby and back. “Your back […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Amasses World’s Largest Collection of Beverly Lewis Books

February 5, 2020 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA Mrs. Beiler, 68, of Lancaster has been a diehard Beverly Lewis aficionado for the past twenty years and during that time has amassed a collection of more than ten-thousand soft cover Amish romance […]

The Daily Bonnet

Meddachschlop Over 60: Five Tips for Mennonite Seniors

February 3, 2020 Andrew

As we age, many things that we took for granted as young Mennonites start to become more difficult. Plowing is hard on the back. Hitting that high note during the Vespers service becomes a challenge. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Jake Dycks Fill Winkler Arena for Annual Jake Dyck Festival

February 2, 2020 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The Winkler Arena was filled to the brim with Jake Dycks this weekend for the twenty-fifth annual Jake Dyck Festival. “There are Jake Dycks around the world from La Crete and Filadelfia to […]

The Daily Bonnet

“It’s Not Dancing!” : Mennonites Gather for Weekly ‘Circle Games’

January 31, 2020 Andrew

REINFELD, MB Dozens of Mennonites are gathering this weekend to hold hands with distant cousins and move around in circles to music. This phenomenon is known as “circle games” and contrary to popular opinion, should […]

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