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The Daily Bonnet

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The Daily Bonnet

‘Free Cotton Swab’ Giveaway Has Mennonites Lined Up for Blocks

June 15, 2020 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Mennonites across northern Saskatchewan were super excited when they heard about this brand new trajchtmoaka in the city who was handing out ‘free cotton swabs’ to anyone and everyone who showed up asking. “Oba, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Swipes Right on Her Own Cousin

June 14, 2020 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Melissa Epp, 20, of La Crete, Alberta was casually scrolling Tinder last night when she stopped on a dreamy young man from Cuauhtémoc who looked to be just her type. “So, naturally […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Flock to Reopened MCC Store to Buy Bigger Pants

June 12, 2020 Andrew

ALTONA, MB More than a thousand eager, and slightly larger, Mennonites were lined up outside the Altona self-help this Friday when they heard the store just got in a fresh supply of pants. “Jauma lied, […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Co-Workers Caught Having Meddachschlop in the Photocopy Room

June 10, 2020 Andrew

MORDEN, MB The rumours about that Thiessen boy and that Klassen girl were confirmed to be true this week after Mrs. Wiebe unlocked the photocopy room and found the two of them having a nice […]

The Daily Bonnet

World’s Most Creative Mennonite Paints Entire House Builder’s Beige

June 8, 2020 Andrew

WATERLOO, ON There’s been a revolution in Mennonite interior design as of late with home owners opting for such vibrant colours as off-white, eggshell and, exclusively for the bold rebel Mennonite type, builder’s beige. “Oba, […]

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