The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Historians Unearth the Mysterious Origins of the Farmer Sausage Burger

August 30, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB After securing a grant from the Plett Foundation and assembling a team that includes renowned historians Aileen Friesen, Ben Nobbs-Thiessen, Andrea Klassen, and Janis Thiessen, researchers have finally solved a mystery that had […]

Unger & Thirst

Paper Straw Totally Disintegrates Before Mennonite Man Gets to the Bottom of His Papsi

August 24, 2022 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area man Art Brandt, 58, was enjoying a Papsi and Ravel at his favourite local burger joint this past week, when he discovered they were now offering paper straws instead of the ones […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Lusts After Another Man’s Plate of Food as it Passes

August 22, 2022 Andrew

FRESNO, CA Harry Ens of Fresno requested a private meeting with the pastor this week to discuss his propensity to lust after other men’s plates of food. “I can’t help myself,” said Ens. “Just as […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Couple Drives 20 Minutes to Another Restaurant to Avoid 5 Minute Wait at the First One

August 20, 2022 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK The Wiebes of Warman were really looking forward to an authentic southern BBQ experience at the Smokey Sausage Diner in Saskatoon this weekend. However, it was not meant to be, as the Wiebes […]

Unger & Thirst

7-11 Introduces New ‘Mennonite Slurpee’

August 16, 2022 Andrew

ROSENGART, MB The yerba mate will be flowing like frozen Papsi this summer, as more than a dozen 7-11 stores in the Pembina Valley darpa will be offering a new product known as the ‘Mennonite […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 41 42 43 … 137 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • New Reports Claims Children Just Faking It, Most Absolutely Love Broccoli and Brussels Sprouts
    June 4, 2022
  • House Speaker Rota Utterly Bewildered During ‘Axis and Allies’ Game
    September 26, 2023
  • Top 10 Most Inappropriate Mennonite Couples
    November 1, 2021
  • Mennonite Church Sets Record By Standing Up and Sitting Down 600 Times in a Single Service
    March 9, 2020
  • Hutterite Colony Team to Join NHL’s 4 Nations Face-Off
    February 12, 2025

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved