The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Breaks His Vow of Pacifism to Defend the Last Can of Pepsi

October 16, 2016 Andrew

HILLSBORO, KS Centuries of non-violent Anabaptist teaching were tossed under the proverbial bus today as Mr. Thomas W. Koop of Hillsboro, Kansas assaulted fifteen innocent people in order to defend his right to the last […]

Unger & Thirst

Court Rules that Mennonites Are Allowed to Keep Their Masks on in the Liquor Store

October 15, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB A Steinbach judge ruled today in favour of religious freedom, allowing Mennonites to wear full facial masks in “potentially embarrassing” public places like the liquor store or casino. “I’m pleased with the decision,” […]

Unger & Thirst

Altona Woman Gets Permit to Use ‘Medicinal Dill Weed’

October 13, 2016 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Altona residents were ecstatic this week after a federal court struck down a ban on the medicinal use of dill weed that had been in place since the late 1960s. “There are so many recipes in the […]

Unger & Thirst

Canadians Gorge on Turkey While Millions of Americans Starve

October 10, 2016 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Yes, Canada has it’s own Thanksgiving holiday and, thanks to an earlier harvest, it comes a full six weeks before the American celebration. This means that gluttons across Canada can fill their bellies […]

Unger & Thirst

Meet the Woman Behind the Pistachio Pudding Shortage

October 9, 2016 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Every Thanksgiving thousands of Mennonites find themselves without the necessary means to make the traditional pistachio salad from the EMMC ladies cookbook, because the stores run out of Jell-o pistachio instant pudding mix […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 132 133 134 … 139 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Dozens of Mennonites Take Ill On Stale Communion Crackers
    July 21, 2025
  • Jaws of Life Required to Extract Red Candy from Oma’s Candy Bowl
    December 28, 2018
  • Church Singles Group Disbanded After Three Decades Without Success
    April 25, 2017
  • 60-Year-Old Mennonite Woman Decides to Retire from Child-Bearing
    May 14, 2017
  • Mennonite Woman to Dust Entire Province of Manitoba
    May 15, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved