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Unger Conviction

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Issues Memo Against Signing Garrett Marino

September 10, 2022 Andrew

REGINA, SK After a number of controversial hits that resulted in him being cut from the team, former Saskatchewan Roughriders defensive lineman Garrett Marino will have to look for work elsewhere. Joining the staff of […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Author Achieves Lifelong Dream of Getting Book in Church Library

August 7, 2022 Andrew

FRESNO, CA Renowned Mennonite author Eleanor Epp, 71, achieved the highest achievement of her literary career this week after two copies of her short story collection A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Menno […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Sunday School Class to Discuss Ethics of Doing ‘Cash Jobs’

August 6, 2022 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB The Eastside Grunthal MCB church will be discussing the ethics of dudes doing jobs for cash in the Sunday morning adult Sunday school class. “Okay, so Garth over there offered to give me […]

Unger Conviction

Chaste Young Mennonites Pledge to Save Hymnal-Sharing for Marriage

August 4, 2022 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Thousands of young Mennonites at the annual ‘Chaste Your Future’ event came forward at the end of a stirring sermon by youth pastor Dan and pledged to save hymnal-sharing for marriage. “I know […]

Unger Conviction

World’s Coolest Mennonite Pastor Wears Fox Racing Hoodie to Church

August 2, 2022 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB In an effort to bring back the crowds, local Pastor Dan will be sporting a camo Fox Racing hoodie from now until church attendance is back to normal. “I might throw in a […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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