The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

Articles by Andrew

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Demands Quackery be Covered By Provincial Health Insurance

November 26, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local woman Mrs. Dueck, 57, of North Kildonan has racked up more than $15,000 over the past couple years in quackery bills and says it’s time the provincial government covers the cost. “They […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Arrested for Stealing Her Neighbour’s Ham

November 25, 2019 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local woman, Sush Janzen, has been arrested by Steinbach RCMP this week for allegedly stealing her neighbour’s schinkjefleesch and threatening a police officer with her cane yet. “He says that I salted him,” […]

Unger Suspicion

Entire Province of Manitoba to Call in Sick Tomorrow

November 24, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After the Winnipeg Blue Bombers ended a 29 year drought and won the 2019 Grey Cup on Sunday, not a single person in the entire province of Manitoba plans to show up to […]

The Daily Bonnet

Uncle Henry Caught Shooting from the Front Line

November 24, 2019 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Uncle Henry has been arrested and is being held in the local Mennonite church basement this week after being caught shooting from the top of five-point zone. “I’ve always wondered how he got […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Vows Never to Wear Suspenders Until the Bombers Win a Grey Cup

November 23, 2019 Andrew

NEUBERGTHAL, MB Oncle Johan Fast has vowed “naver aver” to wear suspenders again until the Winnipeg Blue Bombers bring home the Grey Cup. Many are supportive of his plan, but others are a little troubled […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 404 405 406 … 708 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Woman Calls Her Coffee Break a ‘Menno Pause’
    June 29, 2019
  • Mennonite Woman Still Waiting for Her Photos to be Developed at Penner Foods
    January 10, 2022
  • Mennonite Students Pin Malcolm Gladwell Posters All Over Their Lockers
    September 7, 2021
  • Christmas Lights Partake in Intermittent Fasting
    December 26, 2021
  • Balenciaga Releases New $2000 Shit-Covered Mennonite Rubber Boots
    May 20, 2024

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved