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Articles by Andrew

The Daily Bonnet

Frugal Manitobans Celebrate as Christmas Gatherings Banned this Year

November 11, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB It looks like frugal southern Manitobans will no longer have to worry about buying Barbies, Captain Underpants books and cheap blended whiskey for the relatives this year, as the maskless “freedom-fighters” among us have […]

Unger Conviction

“People just keep coming forward”: ‘Just As I Am’ Played Continuously Since 1967

November 10, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB When Mrs. Helen Penner sat down to plunk away at ‘Just as I am’ in 1967 at the quonset on Mill Street in Steinbach, little did she know that the response to the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach “Most Generous Community in Canada” Once Again After Surge in Covid Fines

November 9, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Steinbachers are known across Canada for their generosity, often topping the list of largest charitable donations per capita. This spirit of generosity appears to continue, this week, as thousands of Steinbachers have each […]

The Daily Bonnet

Whole Foods Bans MCC Peace Buttons

November 8, 2020 Andrew

TORONTO, ON In order to be consistent with their recent poppy ban, Whole Foods Canada has also banned anyone from coming into the store wearing one of those MCC Peace Buttons. “Please wear a mask, […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Man’s Biggest Fear is Showing His Fear

November 6, 2020 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Fear of being perceived as being fearful is an at all time high these days, with thousands of insecure men who fear being seen as fearful posting stuff like “stop living in fear” […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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