WINNIPEG, MB
The Winnipeg Jets scored a major coup this week after signing hometown hero and NHL legend Jonathan Toews, who, according to rumours, signed with the team exclusively because “they’re the only ones who didn’t butcher my last name.”
With their proximity to Vankla and Schteinback, Jets’ executives were able to consult with experts on the pronunciation of names like this.
“This whole time I thought it was ‘toes,”” said team GM Kevin Cheveldayoff. “Good thing I had some farm boys from near Gretna somewhere to correct me.”
The team will be providing lessons for the players on how the OE makes an “A” sound and the W is pronounced like a “V.”
“The first two weeks of training camp will be dedicated to getting that name right,” said Cheveldayoff. “We’re even bringing in other notable Toewses like Miriam and Vic to give a few lessons.”
Jets fans are optimistic about the signing, believing that with Toews on board the team may finally be able to get past the Blumenort Menno Knights in the conference finals.
